I don’t have a cavity. It isn’t the dental apocalypse. The Mayans were wrong. And when the hygienest cleaned my teeth, she didn’t even use the horrible scrapey thing. There was a vibrate-y water thing instead. It sounded worse than death but it took like literally three minutes to clean all my teeth. Which was crazy. It was probably alien technology. They’re probably aliens. That would also explain why they weren’t running late, because every dentist ever is always running late. Good try, aliens, but you didn’t do your research. Your cover is blown. En garde!
I have been watching far too much Family Guy & Doctor Who.